'Tis the season to wear sweatpants

By Lauren Murakami

November 28, 2005 | As the chill hit Logan last week the act to getting out of bed became almost impossible to overcome. My five pillows surrounding me, my down comforter, my special blankie, and even my sheets weighed on top of me and my decision to roll out of bed. My cold room made it unbearable to wake up to the harsh realities of life as opposed to my warm pleasant dreams in bed. Even a hot shower wasn't appealing, because unfortunately I know the cruel truth, that I have to get out of the water sometime and walk through the Logan tundra to class.

I made a deal with myself that morning, I wouldn't shower, instead I traded the extra time to sleep. So at 8:45 I rolled out of bed, brushed my teeth, wiped off the erroneous eye make-up that managed to find its way onto my forehead, threw on my beanie, grabbed my bag and headed to class.

As I walked through the TSC I wasn't ashamed of my disgustingness, I wasn't proud either. I just didn't care, mostly because I was tired. But I did notice just how many people who were wearing sweatpants along with me. I felt an instant connection with all the students who proudly raised their white flag and surrendered to sweatpants. With what little energy I had I tried to unite and make contact with my comrades. Once you fill the inner warmth, the extreme comfort and the waistband flexibility, you will never go back to getting ready and the misery of wearing jeans.

As I slowly sipped my coffee, without even the disguise of a book in front of me, I sat at the Hub by myself. Staring ahead at all the hustle and bustle of students walking and I wondered what their personal reason was in wearing sweatpants.

Do people like the options they have when wearing sweatpants? If they decide to work out they don't have to go home and change, they're already set and ready to go. Or if they decide to go back to bed, they're already set and ready to go.

Have they finally realized no one looks good in the winter, everyone has to walk in the snow, and everyone's hair gets messed up. No one cares if you don't shave your legs, or if you don't shower, because you have layers covering your entire body. With jeans sometimes your butt hangs out you may think its cool to wear a thong. But with sweatpants, if your butt hangs out, you get to wear boxers and you know that's cool, because 50 Cent does it. Could they be the athletes at USU, because usually that is how I recognize the athletes.

Were they cramming for a final, studying all night hopped up on coffee and Triscuits? Or were they up all night, and those are their boyfriend's sweatpants? Are sweatpants the new way to wear your boyfriend's clothes, kind of like the letterman's jacket but cooler because you are still in his pants?

Or is it just the season to wear stretchy pants because of the massive amounts of food the holidays and the colder weather bring about? Sweatpants not only move with your belly, but the flexibility make it so you never have to feel the restraint that last year's jeans constantly have on your waist, thighs and kankles, (just kidding, I just love that word).

Are sweatpants the new fashion statement? Every store carries them, from American Eagle to Wal-Mart. They come with stripes up the side, in every color, with words, or numbers, and in a variety of sizes. I seem to think, like Jenco's the more oversized the pants are, the better.

Has everyone finally surrendered their last hope of finding a boyfriend to cuddle with before it gets cold? Did they resign and put on the does-nothing-for-your-figure, don't-look-at-me-pants. Their cute "new school clothes" wardrobe ran out, as well as their will to be cutesy and get dressed up.

So whatever the reason people wear sweatpants, I commend them. It is nearing the end of the semester. It is freaking freezing. There is nothing going on. It really isn't worth getting ready. If you have a boyfriend, then you already have a boyfriend, no need to impress. If don't you don't have a boyfriend, realize no one looks good with a red, sniffling nose, layers of clothing and galoshes, just give up. It is cold and windy and no one looks up anyways while walking because they are focused on avoiding the wind and not falling on the ice.

I personally like to hibernate during the winter, and being ready for nap at any time of the day whenever I can fit it in, proves reason enough for me to never get dressed again. Sweatpants for life.

NW
MS